Living out Values

Life. Beauty. Wonder. Hope. These all occur more frequently when I'm living out my values, following my dreams, opening my heart to life and all thatcomes with it. I was recently given a homework assignment to one week, write down all my values and the next to live them out. My values are:

*relationships

*faith

*school

*helping others

*writing

*photography

*pilates

*running

*laughing

*art

*love

*painting

*spontaneity

*freedom

*coffee with the sunrise

*sunsets

*beaches

*a good cry

*counseling

*animals

*nature

*parks

*sobriety

*the first flowers blooming in spring

*relaxing nights with friends

*living in the moment

*gifts

These all give me life. They allow me to feel connected to the world. Relatio

nships are my number one value. I get energy from others. Whether I'm doing well or struggling in my recovery, being with others is important. It's how I learn who I am, who I want to be and reminds me of my dreams. This past weekend while in NY at the NEDA conference, I formed new relationships and built on others. I felt so charged up. Despite it being a challenging weekend, I still felt hope for my future. I was reminded of my desire to do advocacy and help others. This has powered me through this week so far.

Sobriety is another value I've been experiencing. While urges get high at times, I'm glad to say that I'm over a month sober now. I am experiencing life, not numbing out to it. I have been more cognizant of being in the moment, enjoying my surroundings and being grateful for the little joys such as laughter. I ate dinner with my mentor friday night and laughed more than I have in awhile. I throughly enjoy the meal, yes ENJOYED a MEAL.

The last thing I will talk about is a message I got from a friend today. Sh

e wrote:

I have struggled since I was 11 and never got better. Even in high school, I looked perfectly fine but my behaviors were all over. After high school, totally downhill into anorexia until this past year. And you were the first person to even be able to open my eyes about life and recovery and believe it was possible. You are so true to yourself the past few years and its so beautiful Jenn. Words can't describe how much you mean to me. And I know I was a jerk in school. It wasn't you, it was me. I used to be really successful like you were in school and extracurriculars until we moved here. So I just wanted what you had. I knew darn well you probably weren't happy. I never was, but at least people admired you. You've changed my life.

It is messages like this that keep me wanting to recover. Helping others is a passion and dream of mine. It brings a spark to me, an energy that is irreplaceable.

What are your values? Your dreams? What keeps you wanting to experience life?